It's an amazing thing when you get a fire in your heart and soul for a project or path in life. It's often a scary thing when you decide to follow the fire onto a new path, and let go of your preconceived notions of who you are and where you always knew you would end up. When you look around at your life and say, "How did I get here?" in alternating tones of bewilderment or wonder, depending on the day or circumstance or (often in my case) level of volume in your house. I say that as I try to write this through the various noises and levels of sound coming from my three-year-old daughter....who was fine until I sat down and started trying to actually do something productive and not centered around her. It's amazing - I think that all three of my children have a condition in which they become physically ill if they see me sitting for longer than 30 seconds at a time. They must get it from their dad...who I love dearly, but who also generally manages to have some need or crisis arise if I sit down....he makes it closer to 90 seconds, though. Sometimes. Must be the adult version of the syndrome.
And now I am totally off-topic. And any hope I had of getting off to a start in which I may seem somewhat profound is blasted into oblivion. Which is probably for the best, since that is how my life goes 99% of the time. I think it's how most of us function anyway, if we're honest. And for the small percentage of women out there to whom this doesn't resonate....well, you won't be interested in this blog. Unless you need to laugh and shake your head at anecdotes that prove just how together you have it compared to the rest of us. Or if you run out of things to put on your prayer list. In that case, head on over. I have a veritable treasure trove for you.
I think this first blog is supposed to be somewhat of a mission statement, letting anyone who may stumble upon it know my purpose and goals for writing it and what they can expect if they read it. To that I say.... well..... I'm not sure how to phrase that. I recently took over the Women's Ministry at my church (God help us all) because of the above-mentioned fire issue, and because the older I get, the more I realize just how much of a sisterhood we need in life. I have lost count of the number of conversations I have had with other women in which I hear some form of the expression, "I am so hungry for authenticity". So, perhaps the simplest description of my thought process is this - so am I, sister....aren't we all.... And that's what has given me the courage to step out, open my mouth and let my thoughts be heard. I have no illusions that anything I say or write will be life-changing or profound, or even something that hasn't been said before. But it will be authentic. And it will be filled with love and honesty and more than a touch of humor. Because the truth is, we need all of those things in this life. God formed us to need them, and to need community with each other as well as with Him. So let's follow orders, do what we were made to do, and hang on to each other as we forge our way through a lifetime of crazy.
Side note: I did have to pause there for a moment to join my daughter in a squealing, hoppy dance in the kitchen as we worked together to kill a spider. She was the spotter, I was the smusher.
Solidarity, sisters. We're starting her early.......